Bloody pisshead!

Been visiting my family in Kent this weekend. Had a fab time, however was not looking forward to the epic train journey home.

Before catching the train from our local village train station, I popped into my sister's bar for coffee (she works in a bar/restaurant on the village green). A little later I caught the train to London, which was relatively painless and arrived at Victoria at approx 12.30pm. Now, I have a fear of the underground so whenever I can get away with it I prefer to walk or catch the bus. Due to the humongous size of my bag (and the distance from Victoria to Paddington) i decided to pay £2 to catch the bus. So I hopped onto the bus, well actually dragged myself + bag onto the bus and plonked myself onto the first seat. The seat happened to be one of the fold down seats near the buggy park area.

The journey started well. Then i noticed a man, perhaps in his late 40s and sporting a single crutch (!). He was sitting at a 90' angle to me and looked a little worse for wear. Anyway, as the bus was moving between stops he decides to get up and staggers around the bus. He moved towards the buggy park area infront of him and then started to bend his legs. 'Surely not,' I thought. 'Surely he is not going to sit on the floor.' As these thoughts were running through my mind he proceeded to bend his legs once more, crutch resting on the floor and sat down. Not only did he sit on the floor of the buggy park, he actually laid down, shut his eyes and went to sleep.

I looked around at my fellow travellers and not one person looked in the slightest bit amused/concerned/amazed! So here he was about a foot away from me, on the floor of a packed London bus. Strewn out in the buggy park, arms and legs inter twinned between the others passengers' legs as they stood up.

Now, wrongly or rightly, i was actually finding this all rather amusing . I found it even more amusing that I seemed to be the only one who had noticed. 'HELLO, there is a strange man on the floor - this is NOT normal.'

I could see his chest moving up and down so I wasn't to concerned that he was dead or anything but I was a little concerned as I considered how he might get off the bus. Will he just keep going round and round on the bus until he wakes up? Will anyone ever notice? Will he finally wake up and crawl out on hands and knees onto the pavement? Again, was it wrong to silently chuckle to myself as I considered these options!?

After 10 minutes the bus stopped. The female driver got out her cab and walked up the bus. Bending down she shouted in his ear 'EXCUSE ME, WAKE UP.' He certainly was not going anywhere, I tell you that now. As a result of his failure to wake up and return to the land of the living, the whole bus load of people had to get off, wait for the next bus and resume our journeys!