Relationships and teaching: one of the same

I am increasing finding that being in a relationship with a man is much like my job, teaching uncooperative teenagers. Now you see throughout my training and three years of teaching I have learnt much about compromise and win-win situations. To allow the student to think they have won and for you too to feel that you have handled the situation in a justified and fair way. It is about letting the little things go unnoticed but ensuring that the more important things are dealt with. And apparently, you are supposed to praise and reward FIVE times more than you punish or discipline.

So my mum and I were decorating the bedroom the other day, something that I was actually enjoying doing as I find it all rather therapeutic, I got to spend time with my mum and I was looking forward to spending time in a beautiful relaxing room rather than the dust pit I have been sleeping in for the past 4 weeks. Anyway, Gloucester arrives home early from work with friend in tow, my first thought (and I was correct I might add) was that he had knocked off early, picked up his mate and gone to the pub. As you can imagine I was not impressed. He comes up the stairs and I just know what he is going to say and what he really wants to do. He wants to go out again to the pub to sit in the sun with his mate. Now the thought of this was really making my blood boil, I mean surely it should be the other way round. He works, I go out!

Gloucester being the person he is would not make things easy, if I said no he wasn’t going out he would have sulked all night, got in my way and not lifted a finger anyway and I, at the end of it, would still not have the lovely bedroom I have been waiting so long for and he would just disturb me and my mum’s ‘women’s gossip’! So I dug deep into my pedagogical knowledge. I struck a deal, “you drive to B&Q to get this paint and then you can go out”. I can hear you all sign and say, “come on that’s hardly a deal, paint verses the pub!” But this paint was £33, the only place you could get it from was half an hour away and I had run out.

So off he goes in rush hour traffic, pays £33 for the paint, brings it back and out he goes. I meanwhile was £33 richer, my mum and I finished off the painting and treated ourselves to a Chinese, bottle of wine, Big Brother and some peace and quiet for the evening! A win-win situation all round me thinks!